"Bullying Should Not Be Tolerated"
Bullies are made, not born.
Bullying makes very unhappy people. On the giving end and on the receiving end. When you have negative energy directed at you from everyone you know, there's NO possible way that you're happy. People might tell you what they think you want to hear, but there's no integrity in those messages.
Any given negative situation or event points out to you that you're heading in the wrong direction. But that's only if you want a better life for yourself.
Ever wonder why the same things keep happening to you over and over? Someone's tapping on your shoulder. Are you listening?
"Bullying Perpetuates Itself"
Young Bullies grow up to be Old Bullies and some of them might even be your co-workers and bosses. And that’s bad news.
Do kids want to grow up to be someone like this? Let’s face it; being one doesn’t mean people like you or respect you. If someone likes being feared, instead of being accepted for who they really are, well, to me, they are asleep at the wheel. It takes a lot more courage to be who you are, instead of hiding behind the façade.
There are two reasons why kids become bullies and therefore grow up to be adult ones. No one stood up to them. Not their parents, not their peers, their grandparents, their siblings, extended family, friends, etc. Or they have learned the behaviour from a parent or parents or someone else who is very close to them.
"It Goes Against Universal Law"
Bullying takes something away from someone else. It goes against a universal law that states “More life to all and less to none”. Bullies impose and threaten others to get what they want. They take away someone’s choice to say, "Yes" or “No”.
Even so, people don’t actually have the power to do that. Contrary to how you might feel. You can just as well say “No” to them. And see what happens!
"Dealing With Bullies"
STAND up to them. Do not encourage their anti-social behaviour. Let them know in no uncertain terms that their behaviour is not welcomed. At the same time, demonstrate what is acceptable.
REFUSE to be a victim. The way schools handle bullying is often to deny a problem exists. For the victim, it is a double insult. So you likely won't get any help there. So your child must go to school emotionally equipped.
Victims allow themselves to be bullied. You have to take responsibility for how you react to a bully or anyone else. No one can make you feel bad; they don't have that power. You choose to be a victim. You have stripped yourself of personal power. So, if you are a victim of bullying, it's important that you change your behavior.
After all, they don't pick on everyone around them. Think about it. Be strong and you can beat the victimhood down.
This is a hard truth. Because you really do have control. Unless you learn to behave differently when faced with this circumstance, the same scenarios will be repeated over and over throughout your life. You may already be aware of this, but hadn't quite faced up to it.
Being bullied is no fun. Do you really like being a victim? Being afraid?
Instead, develop your emotional intelligence and face the demon.
"It's Never Appropriate Behavior"
You see, I don’t care what the motivation is for what this person might want. But I do know that there are appropriate ways to behave and go after something without running ripshod over other people. Again, it takes courage and self confidence to stand up for what is right.
Sometimes it happens that parents are victims of bullying, by their own children. if you're an adult with low self esteem, this is going to happen. You need to stand up to your children. You have to drag up that hidden self esteem out of yourself and confront the difficulties. That means you'll have to make a decision to help your kids change their ways. Either do it yourself or find help.
Remind yourself that you are the adult in the relationship. You have to set your boundaries too.
"Are You My Bully?"
Children learn behaviours from their parents. It’s easy to be a bully. A kid may pick up on that and mimic it. Especially if they see it benefiting them. Such benefits are short lived though.
Bullying is based on self hate, rather than self love and respect. All so-called negative emotions stem from fear. Do you really want to live like that? Will you be brave enough to examine your own behaviour and break the cycle right now so that the following generations don’t have to suffer the way you have?
Strong negativity always hurts you more than anyone else. Stop living this way. Find help. Help that makes you accountable to learn how to treat yourself with respect and love. That's what it comes down to. Break out of bad habits and thought patterns. Stop believing that you are a bad person.
This is the good news. Things can be different with commitment, consistency, and continuity. Remember: more life to all, less to none.
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Return from Bullying To Happy Kids